To be reread on my darkest of days.
The seasons must be changing, or the stars aligning, or both.
I’m not just saying that because I forced my internal seasonal clock to think it was fall today, as you may have seen previously posted with copious amounts of pumpkin coffee and my favorite striped sweater, I’m also saying because I’m having an oddly perfect day of clarity today. SANS THE DEPRESSION that always shortly follows.
This. Is. Huge. Mentally, at least!
So here are the things on my mind that I feel I need to share.
1). Yaaaaaas, of course, you are going to die, you aren’t special enough to get to skip out on one of the life’s most important events, but if you don’t enjoy it to the fullest while you can what was the point to begin with?
Oh, and to answer your impending next ‘what IS the point of it all’ question, there isn’t, you make your own points.
2). Though it may seem obvious working at a travel company, I forget sometimes how important travel and it impacts on living in general is. That being said, I have planned my next 5 years (on the off chance I still am living my ‘kid-free’ life then), travel wise. I’m taking my boyfriend/fiance to Jamaica, my mother to Vancouver, my father to Ireland, and my best friend to Australia…well, here’s to hoping, at least.
3). Back to the kid-free thing….I hope I have to change my travel plans sooner than expected, that’s all I will say.
I need to teach someone the way I feel about life and it’s beauty and watch them live and be happy and free and have all the opportunities I did (and didn’t). I need a little baby Brent and Me to show the world what love is again (plus it will undoubtedly be the most gorgeous baby in the world with its father’s eyes).
4). Writing is seriously the only thing myself and my soul need to be doing, again, maybe obvious, but I forget how important/impactful it is to my wellbeing and creativity. Besides getting out what has been bottled in for so long, such as this post, I know my travel writing and novel aspirations will take me far. Have you read any of my She pieces yet? Take a look at a few, tell me what you think!
5). FITNESS FITNESS FITNESS. New life motto (yes, possibly a tattoo as well), HEALTHY, NOT HOT.
When I first lost all my weight in college I was aiming to be hot, to be wanted, to be what every man desired. I’m not saying that motivation didn’t work, I mean I did lose 105 pounds overall. However, today I’m becoming skinny fat, unmotivated, and most importantly, unhealthy. I want to get fit again, the right way, for my health, not for any guy or vain reason beyond that.
Healthy, not hot. Besides, will I, or anyone I know, be worried about ‘hot’ when we are 75 and swapping life stories? No.
6). I avoid working at work entirely too much, this last 20 minutes could have been devoted to office work instead of this blog entry, so back at it I go!